My mom, my best friend

I'm not sure when it happened, must have been somewhere between " because I said so" and " keep it up and I'll really give you something to cry about " my mom became my best friend. Oh, wait, I know when it happened, when I became a mom! My mom is the greatest mom you will ever meet, and she has learned to loosen up a bit more lately, that makes it even better, she has a great smile! She taught me so much with out even realizing it, she taught me that it doesn't matter how much money you make, what kind of house you live in, or what kind of clothes you wear, if you love yourself and your family, you are the richest person around, and everyone will want to be friends with you. She taught me to treat others as I would want my grandparent, parent, child to be treated. She is still showing me things, She reminds me to slow down and smell the roses, that we are not guaranteed tomorrow, and to enjoy the day you are living today. She taught me that it's not the 5 star vacations that you will remember, its getting lost along the way, its the caravan of vehicles heading to disney with walkie talkies to help the time pass. She taught me to take pictures of EVERYTHING, and label them. Best of all, she taught me to forgive those who wrong me and pray for the ones that think they are better than me... I love you mom!

God's will

• What a week this has turned out to be, we had another appointment yesterday with Dr. Angie, in Baton Rouge this time. So anxious to get the results!!! But what will they mean? Where will we go on this leg of our journey? I don't know, but I do know that I am doing the best that I can, and it's showing, people are noticing, I have always enjoyed helping others, that is what God wants us to do, that is why we are put on this earth. I want to share a story with you guys about something that happened to me yesterday after the doctor appointment.  We went to the doctor, so we get out and its lunch time. Keith's hungry, I'm hungry, so we stop at a Mc Donalds not far from the doctors office
• So we order our food, and go sit, the place is packed, then an older gentleman comes to sit near us at another table, he was walking with his walker, and the tray was on the walker "seat" so he goes to his table, and hes steadying himself with one hand and trying to put his food on the table with the other, when I looked up and saw him I immediately went over to help him. He had done most of the work himself, his drink and hamburger were already on the table, but he was wrestling with his napkins, so  I offered to help him, put his napkins on his table, and I took his tray for him and put it where they go, so then I went back to my table and we ate our lunch, all of a sudden a man walked up to me and said " excuse me, god bless you for what you did for that man, there should be more people like you in this world" I smiled and said thank you and he walked away, but it really made me feel good even though I didn't do it for anyone to notice. Everyone helps out the elderly and less fortunate right?

life alone

Well, our journey for answers has brought us here, MORE TESTS... but we will go where we are sent and take the test, the results will be available to us November 1st. What will this diagnosis bring? Will he receive the services the dr prescribes? How hard will it be for me to get any services she prescribes? It is tough being a single mom, but it is a trillion times harder being a single mom to a special needs child, you are alone, there is nobody to comfort you at night when you hit a brick wall trying to get help for your child, leaving messages on voice mails not sure if you will hear back from anyone. And, you can't "just date" cause you have special needs as well, most guys hear "special needs" and walk away, you are a different kind of package deal...but the children ALWAYS come first, so you trudge along alone and do what you must for your child, the fairy tale ending you dreamed about as a child is gone, it's not happening...but for today, you got him off to school with homework completed and in tow, pray he turns it in?! It could always be worse...faith in God gets me thru the darkest days, and my son's smile. Have a great day everyone and enjoy life

Blue Blue Christmas

Okay, thats it! Christmas is cancelled, stop all production of anything related to Christmas! Dreau just told me that he will NOT be home for Christmas, how can we have Christmas without Dreau?! IMPOSSIBLE! sleeping thru the holiday...yea right, don't think Kevin and Keith would appreciate that too much, the life of a military family is soooo hard, and everywhere you turn, you see how hard military wives have it, and how lonely they are, well, what about the mothers who carried this child in their womb for 9 months, and raised them, watched them grow and blossom into young men or women whatever the  case may be, we matter too! Anyway, I miss my child, and I was so looking forward to Christmas... oh well, maybe next year? please?

God Bless America

Gil's home! praise God that he made it home safely, I haven't seen him, dont know if I will, how will I feel seeing him? I have been doing good at holding it together, how much longer will it last before I just turn to mush?  Jude's coming home, I can't wait to see him... when am I gonna see Dreau again? that is who I miss so bad it hurts to breathe sometimes, Dreau will do great and wonderful things in his life, he will see things we cant even imagine at this time, but for tonight he''s my son, and i miss him...

Dr visit looming

Well, October 12 is here, 2 days, I am still as nervous as I was when I made the appointment, what will she find, how will our lives be forever changed? Where do we go from here?I have cried, prayed, talked to friends, but still...my heart breaks for my child, what must he think of me? taking him to one dr after another for opinions, I hope he doesn't think that i want a different or perfect child, I don't want to "fix" him so much as I want him to have a happy life. When he was born, he was a beautiful child, he was more fussy than my other children and I remember thinking, thank god I had him later in life, cause I never would have had the patience at 19 for this child! Patience is definitely not a gift that is simply inherited, you learn it thru time... I almost feel like Dorothy following the yellow brick road. Today was Fall Break, I had phone calls to make, emails to go through, coupons to print, but he wanted to bowl with me on the wii, and he has a way of reminding you that you said  you would play with me! so I caved and bowled 2 games with him, then I learned later that i also lost a round of tennis against him... he played both characters! Today we built a good memory... what will tomorrow hold?